William Bruce Dryburgh Jr

THE LOSS OF A FATHER

BAMBI BISCAN

The Bible states “the thoughts of a man’s heart are like deep waters..” and this was true in the life of William Bruce Dryburgh Jr, my father. He was a man of few words and exceptionally deep thoughts. The oldest of 6 children, he shouldered much but expressed little. He loved reading, fishing, riding motorcycles, and traveling probably because it allowed him quiet solitude. But he would always return for family dinners and his mama’s lamb and lemon meringue pie.

When he was 24 he married Lucinda and after a surprise honeymoon in Canada, they eventually moved to New Mexico and started a family. Soon their girls Fawnya & Bambi joined them. He began sharing his love of travel by surprising them with impromptu day trips to secret destinations that grew to be called “ventures”. He learned the hard way that you cannot trust little girls to wear proper footwear for secret ventures when they just received brand new dress shoes! No more unconfirmed wardrobes for secret destinations.

Bryce came along seven years later, and he shared his love of motorcycles by taking Bryce for a ride in the sidecar of a friend’s bike. To seal the deal he whispered to him, “don’t tell your mom”, and it was kept a secret until now. Five more years and a surprise later Alexander made his appearance. Alex became his “little buddy” and the normal after-school pickup routine became exciting uphill races to the car. His boys brought him much joy and another childhood.

Unfortunately, life is far more complex than a few paragraphs allow for, and it must be said that for all of the fun in those moments, there was also sorrow. He would help others, but not himself, and after years of avoiding his ailments, his body was shutting down. Discovered too late, cancer had taken over, and he did not have the energy to fight for his life. So he chose to enjoy his last precious moments with love & laughter, hugs & tearful goodbyes while surrounded by stories of times past with family & friends from near and far. Little did he know how loved he really was.

To watch him blissfully enjoy his last bite of concord grape puree and to hear him say “mama” for the last time when hearing his mother’s voice on the phone will forever be etched in our memories as we reflect on what’s important and simple yet complicated and vast. These small moments were beautiful in simplicity, yet heart-wrenching in finality. Too often we are lost in the complexities of life that we forsake the things that bring the most joy in living. He said he was sorry to us all, and a lifetime of sorries not spoken was forgiven. He said he was not afraid to die, but we knew he was sad to leave us. He knew death was likened to a deep sleep from reading the Bible, and we know he most certainly welcomed the rest. He is no longer suffering and for that we are grateful, we will cherish the closeness that his final days allowed us to be, but we will mourn. We will mourn, not only the past, but a future not yet to be as we continue missing him terribly.

He is survived by his Wife, his children and four grandchildren as well as all of his siblings and his Mama. There will not be public services, but a small family gathering at a later time.